Wednesday, December 22, 2004

I can't win...

The Christmas pageant is over, and somehow my youngest son managed to be a focus of things once again. Last year he did so by playing his sword like an air guitar (complete with appropriate grimaces) and almost starting a fight on stage during closing prayer. He has a flair for dramatic style comedy. Who knew?

This year we parents resolved to not have a repeat. We spent six weeks trying to convince this lad not to act up on stage. You might think that's excessive. If you do, let me say this: You don't know my youngest son.

Let me explain. He is cute. I am not being biased here. Everyone tells me his is cute. Big eyes. Long eyelashes. People stop me in the street, the mall, anywhere, just to tell me how cute he is.

Let no one think that this has escaped his notice. It most assuredly has not.

He was a reader at his school Christmas cantata. He was chosen from his class for that role. He emphasized often that he was chosen. Sounded like a 5 pt Calvinist. Anyway, he did his part very well. If you can picture the scene, he had to get a box to step on just so he could reach the microphone. He had to stretch across the pulpit to read his lines. He spoke in tones that emphasized that he is an innocent child. The sweet and cute factor is off, I repeat, off, the chart. He completes his reading, and the church erupts in applause, preceded, of course, by 150 girls under the age of 14 all saying "awwwwwwwwwwwwwww...."

Again, do not be mislead into thinking that as a 6 year old that this would escape his notice.

That night, as he was being put to bed, he said to his mother: "Did you hear the way they went "awww"? They thought I was cute. "

This was only 5 days ago.

Yes, he is cute. And he knows it.

He also knows he likes the spotlight.

He is also a smart alec.

Today, as I waved to him from behind the counter where I work (the other job), he called to me. I was rather expecting "Bye Daddy, I love you." My hopes were, however, to remain unfulfilled.

He called out: "Daddy! Shouldn't you be getting to work?"

This in front of the store General Manager, and the Company District Manager.

From all reports he was indecently pleased with himself, telling anyone who would listen what he said.

All I can say is "revenge is a dish best served cold."

Anyway, he was the spotlight again this year for the most part. He did not act outrageous or pull any stunts. He just sang.

Did I mention he is tone deaf? No? Well I had no idea myself. Until tonight.

How I wish I had an audio recording to play at his eventual wedding reception.


Juner said...

I'm sorry I missed it this year...but then again, at least no one had to be distracted by my "Gee, lets pick my nose and eat it in front of 400 people" children, who have done it EVERY year.

On a completely different topic:

Could you please email me the following (if you have time)

-all Biblical backing as to Gods command against any and all homosexuality, and how it is interpreted
-a brief synopsis of the common evangelical stand on the sanctity of marriage and why it is to be exclusively between man and woman
-the standard evangelical views on exactly why one would end up a homosexual
-any other info on this topic

I'm posting a Blog on this shortly and am including views from both the informed evangelical Christian and the equally informed homosexual.

Kim said...

Having been a witness to the said event, I have never laughed so hard reading your blog as I did this one!!! The little guy has "preacher" written all over him. Are you tone deaf too?????